Baby Talk

Any of you who have ever found out you are pregnant probably know the swirl of emotions and thoughts that surround such exciting and life changing news. Everything from: Oh sh*t! This is the best news ever. How are we going to afford this? I wonder if it is a girl or a boy? Names? Which room will the baby get? What were we thinking? I’m so excited! all seem to pass through your mind in seconds. There is something about the seriousness of being responsible for another human being and the finality of it all. I mean you are in it. No turning back.

Even though we have done this twice before, it still happens. Yup, within minutes we manage to freak out and be super excited all at the same time. If you watched the video from the previous post you know that Quinn is pretty excited about the new baby. Quinn has requested, “a whole baby collection”. Eleanor doesn’t really know what is going on.

Now let us get one thing straight, I am down right ecstatic to be pregnant and cannot wait to meet this little being. I am a family kind of girl. I choose to be a stay-at-home mom and really adore what I do. I have loved watching Quinn and Eleanor’s relationship grow. I think family makes us all better. We bring out the best in each other, we challenge each other, we keep each other humble and grounded (anyone with siblings knows what I mean) and we have fun together. Having brothers and sisters is a blessing and I am so thankful I can give that to my children.

A lot of you have been wondering how I have been feeling. For the most part I feel pretty good, except for the exhaustion. Hopefully that passes soon. You may have noticed a drop off in blogging. That drop off stems from pure exhaustion. That exhaustion has also lead to a large pile of laundry and a general disaster in our house. But I am not even going to feel bad about it, because I am growing a whole human being and that is a lot of work. I don’t remember being this exhausted with the other two. I suppose chasing a 1 and 4 year old around all day and pushing 30 might have something to do with it. I had some slight nausea that came in waves, which struck me as odd since I didn’t have nausea with Quinn or Eleanor.

This baby will be due the month before Eleanor turns two and Quinn will be just over four and a half. Some of you might be wondering, was this planned? Yup, it was. About as planned as it was going to get. I mean there were no calendars or charts or tracking involved, but we were trying.

The funny thing is, with Quinn I needed time. He was such a big baby (11 lbs. 15 oz. 23.5 inches) and had done a number on my body. Labor had been anything but good and it ended in an emergency c-section and Quinn being whisked away to the ICU. It was a tad traumatizing. Quinn was a very, very needy baby and we got very little sleep that first year. I also nursed for a year, despite all our troubles with getting him to latch. On top of all that, he was our first child and I think the shock of how much our lives had changed left me yearning for normal. I NEEDED a year to myself. A year where I wasn’t growing a baby or nursing a baby. A year to start to feel normal and like me again.

Eleanor turned out to be a planned c-section (despite my efforts for a VBAC). She was a pretty easy baby. She slept…thank god! The transition from one baby to two was actually really easy. It didn’t leave me feeling like I needed time. In fact, the opposite happened. I had Quinn when I was 25 and I am turning 30 this January. I am kind of at the point that I just want to be done. Pregnant, not pregnant, nursing, not nursing, losing baby weight, putting on baby weight. I don’t really want to drag this out forever. I just want to commit to a routine, invest in a wardrobe and enjoy my family.

This might lead you to wonder if three is it. I don’t think so. Well, I guess I don’t really know. I always wanted 4 kids. I think I still do. I will let you know what I think after I have three. My dream was always two girls and two boys. Everyone has a sister and everyone has a brother. That is perfection to me. We will see if I have the guts and the luck to pull it off.

Unfortunately, we live in the real world and we have some real concerns. We are now on my husband’s insurance and this baby is going to cost us somewhere between 7-8,000 dollars. We will have two years to pay that off before it goes to collection. We struggle making ends meet as a family of four. Now we will be a family of 5 with about $250 in medical bills due for the baby. On top of that we need a car, preferably a minivan. We have one car and it cannot fit three car seats.

Of course I question my ability to meet my children’s needs. Mostly Eleanor, seeing as thought she will just be two with a brand new baby in the house. I wonder if I can handle three kids, I only have two hands. I worry about having a healthy pregnancy and a healthy baby. Mostly, I try not to think about it and just tell myself everything will be okay.

And although money is a concern and I have all these other thoughts running through my head, if I just stop and look around I am amazed at how blessed I truly am. Although money may be tight, I am not without. I have a loving husband and a strong marriage, two beautiful children and another one on the way and I get the joy of spending each and every day with my little miracles.


Sharing these thoughts at: Thrifty Decor Chick: November Before and After Party

  • Jessyca Booth

    Ahhhh! Congratulations! We’re due the same month! I totally understand all the concerns as well as the excitement you mentioned. We have to get a bigger vehicle AND a bigger house. Its super scary but I know it will all be worth it.

    • Megan Bray

      Congrats to you too! It will all be worth it and I know things will find a way of working themselves out.

      • Jessyca Booth

        I wasn’t able to watch the video earlier because I read this on my phone but I just watched it now. So cute!!! Bebe? bebe? Adorable! And Quinn’s excitement was so neat to see – especially when he realized the new little one will be his friend too. Congrats again!

        • Megan Bray

          Thank you Jessyca :)

  • Renae C

    Congrats!!! Reading this I can relate so, so much! I am preggo with #2 due in early March, and my son won’t be 2 till the end of March. Not as crazy as having 3 through I guess :-) We are also on a new insurance plan (that just switch during my pregnancy) that will end up costing us more money now and we are on a super tight budget. It’s encouraging though that you make 1 car work with 2 kids, since we have been down to 1 car for almost the past year now.

    I’m glad I clicked over to read your blog and can’t wait to read how things work out! Here’s to a easy and healthy pregnancy for you!

    • Megan Bray

      Thank you so much & right back at you.

  • Heidi Milton

    Hoping you’re feeling A-ok soon! Everything has a wonderful way of working out — 3 kids is totally do-able. :-) You’re a super hero anyway!
    xo Heidi

  • Laura

    I am new to follow your blog, and I just want to offer you some encouragement. My three are similar age differences to yours. My middle is an October 08 baby, older brother is 3 years older than she is, and younger brother is 21 months younger. My big kids adjusted amazingly well to having another baby at home. Like you, our hardest adjustment was from 0 to 1 kid. :) The rest were easy in comparison. In the beginning, you just make sure everybody is fed and clean. Clean-ish. 😉 But it won’t take you long to settle into a routine as a family of five. There’s plenty of love to go around. God is good, and he provides. Congratulations!

    • Megan Bray

      Thank you for the kind words and the encouragement. Glad to have you as a follower :). I’ll settle for cleanish ;).

  • Cayce

    I just wanted to offer encouragement. my 2 are 21 months apart and i’m now pregnant with #3, due in Jan. It’s a good kind of crazy. Also, about the car. I have a friend who fit 3 carseats in the back of her Honda Civic!! It was crowded and funny, but it worked. Also, about the medical bills, (i used to work in medical billing). If you contact them and discuss your situation they will set up a more manageble payment plan and will not turn you over to collections. As long as you keep paying and stay in contact with them they will let you take a much longer amount of time. They don’t want to turn it over to collections so if they see you make your regular payments on time you shouldn’t have a problem.
    Also, we cloth diaper, which will save you tons of money and i promise is easy and not gross, just email me if you want more info.

    • Megan Bray

      Thanks for the words of encouragement. I wish three cars eats were possible! My husband is 6’7 so he has to push his seat pretty far back, which invades on carseat space as well. I know some five passenger cars can pull it off though. The medical bill info is good to know. We will for sure keep it in mind. I don’t know how, yet, but I have faith it will all work out. Congrats on number 3 :).

  • JaneEllen

    Congratulations Meagan Somehow you get thru it. You’ll be so busy you won’t notice things that used to bother you. What absolutely beautiful babies you and your hubs make. Whatever #3 is will be healthy and gorgeous and it’s own person.
    I have 4 kids. I thought I was done after 3, divorced, met and remarried and had #4. I told him when we got married if he wanted any kids he’d better decide as I wasn’t have any when I was 35. I turned 30 a few months after my 4th. Good thing as when she was about 2 I had to have a hysterectomy. Thanks God, good timing.
    I was 20, 11 days after I had my 1st. Had 3rd. 3 months before I was 24. Just popping those little stinkers out. Luckily I had healthy gorgeous babies also.
    Somehow I managed to take care of all of them. I was also pretty darned young.
    When my 2nd. was about 9 months old I had to have a thyroidectomy and I was 2 months pregnant for 3rd. baby. Didn’t tell the doc I was pregnant. How was I going to take care of 3 little ones after that kind of surgery so I kept my mouth shut. My ex wasn’t exactly Mr. Wonderful helpful and he wasn’t one bit happy about me being pregnant..
    When youngest son (3rd. baby) was about 7 months old and teething he kept me up for 3 days and nights (at least). Mr.ex screamed at me one night that I’d better shut that kid up or he would, he had to get some sleep. Aw gee thanks honey.
    Maybe I saw the hand writing on the wall then huh? I was 25 still when we got divorced. . Didn’t drive and we lived out in boonies by air force base in Tucson.
    It still seems like a miracle that my now husband of almost 44 yrs. wanted to marry us. I wasn’t sure which of us he wanted more, my 3 little angels or me. I met him at a laundry/dry cleaners where I worked. We got together on 10/18/68 for our 1st date. We got married on 11/30/68 and on 12/26/68 he left for Nam. He was part of the Jolly Greens helicopter team rescue and recovery.

    Yours was one of the 1st. blogs I subscribed to and have always enjoyed hearing about and seeing pics of your adorable kids. Have always enjoyed your blog and your projects. Happy life Meagan, look forward to that new baby.

    • Megan Bray

      I’m glad you did find Mr. Wonderful. Even more cool is you found someone to love & appreciate those little angels of yours. 4 kids by 30…very impressive. My mom did it, but she had a two-for-one deal (I’m a twin). Thank you so much for the kind words. We’re really excited to meet this little bundle. It is such a blessing to have such supportive and wonderful readers like yourself.